Reflecting on the birth experience

Reflecting on the birth experience is humbling – what a God ordained day! The lead up to the birth, complete unity in our marriage regarding the decisions about the birth and care plan, the team of doctors which came together around us, the timing of the birth and God helping us with our work and leave in such a way that we could fully give ourselves to the moment and have space to see where things would go, the compassionate response and staff at the hospital, and then the unexpected outcome!

Serene would be a good way to describe how I was that day. I was at peace and interested to see what God would ordain for Sarah-Hope’s life (and ours!). Rich was buoyant and excited to meet his daughter. We could still feel her kicking away so we were pretty sure we would get a chance to meet her alive which is what we had hoped for.  

How did we feel that she was here to stay? At the actual birth, Rich got the first opportunity to hold her after she had been checked out (I was still being stitched up). He describes that moment as one where a heavenly love for Sarah-Hope literally invaded his heart. He was totally captivated. Receiving God’s love for Sarah-Hope was a tangible experience of how perfect love drives out fear – all the worries we had about what we would do if we she survived seemed to disappear. Love was stronger.

There were still ups and downs. A few days later when her platelet count was found to be very low (an infection was suspected – and many babies born with hydrops die from infection), we weren’t sure what to think and remained guarded as her medical condition was being monitored. But we felt full of purpose – we had started our family and it was the most fulfilling experience of our lives. No one expected Sarah-Hope to come out “ready to go” – and while this amazed doctors (especially those who had tracked her condition throughout the pregnancy), for us there was such a sense of God in our midst. He released us from the burdensome decisions about life support – He had given her life. The presence, peace and grace of God that we knew at that time was enthralling. Yes, there was pain and we still had a long road ahead, but God was with us and we felt thrilled to be on this adventure with Him. We had fallen into the hands of God!